"Motivational" posters set1

Telatah Tasha 2: Abjab

Ini telatah si Tasha. Kisah si kecil yang baru berumur 3 tahun. Dia petah bercakap dan sentiasa ada saja benda nak dia perkatakan.

previously.

Tasha: (sambil menunding jari ke screen tv) Mama tu 'N' kan mama.

Mama: Bukan le tasha tu 'M'. 'M' for monkey

Tasha: Bukan la mama nie 'N' nie (sambil menguis sesuatu di atas screen tv)

Mama: La 'ant' tu ke. Semut merah ek.

*******

Tasha: Ikan nie nama dia Comel kan Mama kan?

Mama: Bukan. Nama dia 'Si Comel' ada 'Si' kat depannye.

Tasha: Bukan la Mama. Kalau 'Si Comel' ada 'S' kat depan la bukan 'C' la.

Hello, anybody home?

******

Si suami: Sayang, kita dpt anak kembar girl nie.

Si istri: Huh? Mana tahu?

Si suami: Nie ada dua pink line nie.

How to confuse an idiot

A chicken, a fox, and a bag of grain

You've got a chicken, a fox, and a bag of grain on one side of the river, and a boat that holds you and one of the chicken/fox/grain. If the fox is left alone with the chicken, he'll eat it. If the chicken is left alone with the grain, he'll eat it. How do you get all across the river so that nobody/nothing gets eaten.

Here how the different type of programmers solved that age old riddle.

Oldschool Programmer: Leave the fox with the grain. Take the chicken across the river. Go back and take the fox across. Leave the fox there, bring back the chicken. Then, leave the chicken and take the grain across the river. Leave the grain there and go back to get the chicken.

Newbie Programmer: Leave the fox with the grain or just throw the chicken across the river.

Hardware Programmer: Kill the fox, the fox is no use to the farmer.

Freelance Programmer: BBQ the chicken, blame it on the fox, and claim crop insurance.

Extreme Programmer: let the chicken eat the grain then the fox eat the chicken. Transfer the fox which contain the chicken that contain grain across the river in one crossing.

MEMO NO. 20090710-0321(U)

RE: MEMO NO. 20090710-0321(U)

Perkara: Akuan 'aku-janji'

U/P: Pekerja-Pekerja baru.

Untuk makluman,

Adalah menjadi satu polisi syarikat agar semua pekerja-pekerja baru (termasuk COO, CFO, CSO, CTO dll) untuk membaca dan memahami sepenuahnya isi kandung ikrar 'aku-janji'.

Di bawah ada disediakan ikrar tersebut. Sila print, tandatangan dan faxkan ke Jabatan Pengurusan Sumber selewat-lewatnya esok hari.

Sekian dan Selama beramal.

Yang menurut perintah,

Sutradara

Jabatan Pengurusan Sumber.

5 Rukun Mengarang Email

Maka Kami, berikrar akan menumpukan perhatian dan sedikit usaha kami untuk mencapai pengunaan email yang berhemah berdasarkan atas prinsip-prinsip yang berikut :

Kewujudan and ketepatan tajuk email.

Kesetian kepada email anti-virus yang terkini.

Kepercayaan kepada pembacaan semula sebelum hantar.

Kesopanan dalam pengunaan HURUF BESAR dan font warna merah.

Kehormatan kepada penerima-penerima email.

Tandatangan

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Nama:

Jabatan:

Top 10 phrases to watch out when applying for a job

10. You didn't need to do off hour support.

9. You'll love working with our guru developer.

8. We're migrating to a new location and upgrading our system.

7. Your job also include looking after the network and databases.

6. You'll be using our in-house scripting language.

5. You just be maintaining our current system.

4. We have flexible working hour policy.

3. There is a bonus for you if the project complete on time.

2. All the requirement are ready, we just need someone the code it.

And No 1 phrases that you should watch out when applying for a job

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